Ode to Sam Gilbert

My ode to you, Sam Gilbert.

Oh Sam Gilbert!
Hi Sam Gilbert!
Woah Sam Gilbert!
Bye Sam Gilbert!
Hey hey!
Oh Sam Gilbert!
Hi Sam Gilbert!
Woah Sam Gilbert!
Bye Sam Gilbert!
Hey hey!

Sam Gilbert is one damn hot topic
She's so philanthropic
If a bit myopic
She's got tons of friends!
Hey hey!
Sam Gilbert is most surely not Irish
Though her hair is fire-ish
So don't call her Irish!
Or she'll probbly get all pissed again!

Sam Gilbert leaves no margin for error
In her reign of terror
But there's nobody fairer
Than the girl up front!
Hey hey!
Sam Gilbert can write beastly essays
She can fill out surveys
And responds well to praise
As long as you don't call her a cunt!

Oh Sam Gilbert!
Hi Sam Gilbert!
Woah Sam Gilbert!
Bye Sam Gilbert!
Hey hey!

Sam Gilbert makes the guys go crazy
Makes the girls go crazy
And the world goes crazy
She is so on the ball!
Hey hey!
Sam Gilbert will not do what you ask her
Cause nobody's her master
And she'll think me a bastard
When I post this on her facebook wall!

Oh Sam Gilbert!
Hi Sam Gilbert!
Woah Sam Gilbert!
Bye Sam Gilbert!
Hey hey!

And she's driving me insane
But she's not your average Jane
Yes she's anything but plain

Oh Sam Gilbert!
Hi Sam Gilbert!
Woah Sam Gilbert!
Bye Sam Gilbert!
Hey hey!
Oh Sam Gilbert!
Hi Sam Gilbert!
Woah Sam Gilbert!
Bye Sam Gilbert!
Hey hey!